Wednesday 20-5-20



I really hate to see girls get fooled. It pains me because you are very undeserving of that. Unfortunately, many of us girls will experience or have experienced being played by a guy. This is solely down to not being aware of the signs of a player, which can only really be noticed through experience or being made aware of it. It is never your fault for being played and it does not mean that there is something wrong with you. You are still a beautiful, kind and worthy of love, person. If he cannot see your worth, he is simply immature and not thinking about taking anyone seriously anytime soon. 

Many of these boys have game (tactics) that will have you thinking you are special to him. Meanwhile, he has 4 other girls feeling the same way. Now that I am older and have experienced the right treatment, it is very easy for me to spot someone that is a player or *F boy*. I am going to share a few signs with you that clearly lets you know that he DOES NOT want you but just wants what he can GET from you. Lets put an end to being used. Please note that I am not a relationship expert.

He only wants to spend time with you where there is a bed. It is a very clear sign that he is playing you if anytime you see him, it is always either at his yard (house) or yours. Even in some cases, a hotel. More specifically, most of your time together is spent in each others bedrooms. This is because he knows it will be quick to get you do things as the vibe is already set. If he really liked you, he would want to spend time with you anywhere. He would be happy to go for walks with you in the park, go to the cinema, maybe take you out to get some desert. F boys would not waste this time with you as he has no interest in getting to know you like that. If you find that he always has an excuse whenever you ask him to go somewhere with you in public, know that he is either busy with one of his other girls at his house or he does not want to be caught out in public with you. This would risk one of his other girls seeing you with him. A guy who wants to be with you will go anywhere with you, he would even hold your hand in public. 

His friends flirt with you. A guy who is playing you will definitely tell his boys that you are easy to get with. He would brag to them about the things he did with you. If he doesn’t like you enough emotionally, he would tell his friends that they can get with you too. In most cases he would do this because he does not respect you. You can read my ‘3 ways to make him take you seriously’, to see some ways on how to fix this. 

When a guy wants to be with you, his friends would not dare to even talk to you without him there. He would have told his boys to respect you because he has strong feelings for you. If his friends were loyal to him they wouldn’t risk ruining their friendship over a girl and so would keep their conversation with you friendly. Never think that his friends cannot resist how attractive you are and would rather ruin their friendship to be with you. If this is the case, he would no longer be friends with them. 

He gets notifications from girls all day. Another clear sign that he is playing you is that whenever you look at his phone, a notification from a girly username pops up every couple of minutes. Whether that be snapchat, Instagram dm, WhatsApp etc. Don’t just ignore the notifications and constant ping sounds, think about why he would be receiving so many messages. This is because he is active. He talks to multiple girls at once. Some might have a lot of friends as girls but I always find that to be strange. Out of all those hundreds of friends that are girls, I am sure some believe that he likes them. Would you really want to be with a guy who is always posting different girls on his snapchat because they are his ‘real ones’ anyway?

These are a few signs that he is playing you. If your guy is showing some of these, please know that you deserve way better and do not have to continue talking to him. If he is doing these things, he is not in the mindset to have a girlfriend right now. He is currently having fun being with different girls. I really don’t want you to be heartbroken over a guy like this. I know it is hard to accept but you cannot change someone who does not want to change. The best thing to do is to wait until someone who wants the same things as you, to approaches you. This would happen when you give time to the right type of guys and set the standards you deserve.  

Love always,

Raquel ♡